announcing the arrival of NOAH NG ZHONG ZHI!

great! he's finally here! he's sooo tiny and cute! and guess who he looks like? SHUA. but no he looks like lebby too! hahah its soo exciting. i guess that's all i have to say for now. i'm kinda not really in a mood for blogging. another time then. ciaos!

i've finished my COMM ISS paper on e-shoppers!!! well cheers!

okay its been a week. time flies. i'm already into week 5 of my second semester of my second year. i'm just about slightly more than a year away from my graduation i hope. well so all i've done in the past week is work and work. fortunate enough for me i had a breather on sunday. I went to grace assembly and the sermon was good - holiness. after the service, poh kwan, von, huiyi and i went out to meet joanne and audrey. had a good time just talking and catching up. and no, we did not go cam whoring. maybe another time. So then after that i went over to huiyi's place. its nice. really nice. her room is cosy and man she has SOOOOO many medals. we relived some secondary school memories.

man i miss those days but i'm also glad that i'm where i am today. But still where i am today? mediocracy, or less than mediocre. so i was walking back with huiyi and i just started to wonder where would i be if i did not go poly. then i remember seeing a prayer that huiyi wrote which she pasted up in her room. The prayer had expressed her fear of failure and had said that even if she fails, she's contend as long as it is in His hands. You know sometimes i wish i could be like her, she has non christian parents but yet she has this faith that i think can stand more than mine. i envy her. i really wish that my walk is right. i try to change, i try to let Him work but somehow it's just not working. maybe it is but i just don't know it yet. sometimes i feel like i got no purpose. i need a purpose. Your purpose.

I've been talking to him alot these days. Honestly, he still makes me laugh. he still makes me smile. despite all that he has done to me. sometimes i blame myself for not being able to hate him. szela, anytime i'd choose someone who can make me laugh rather than someone who can get me excited. excitement is short lived, one day when he calls you won't be excited. but if he can make you laugh, he can always make you laugh again. you know how i imagined passing my 18th birthday which is in exactly a month's time? its not happen. NO its not. and somehow there's an episode of gilmore girls where rory experiences the exact same thing. but no matter how many people around me celebrates it with me, it'd still be lonely. because the person who matters is not there. maybe he wont even remember. maybe i should be a robot. then everytime something goes wrong, i can load a new programme and after loading.... meet the new abigail version 1.18.

eighteen is the .......... loneliest .......... number.

hello everyone there. i've decided not to go through my not o everyday post telling only simply a story but also reflecting on my day. so forgive my random, abrupt changes in topic if there even is one. i'm not much of a reflector anyway.

okay so here it goes.

well, on monday, i woke up for class to reach school aroun 8 to 830 right? and then when i reach there at 810, there's no sign of the lecturer. so yeah i see this girl there waiting. started a convesation with her. so then we kept talking to occupy ourselves and then we kinda realised that mannnn she is late. it was almost 9! then i kinda wondered how many times were we students who were late actually made a lecturer wait like that and feel like we waste their time. i guess we shouldn't be late for lessons then. ahah! DUH.

okay so then i went to catch a movie with a joyce - Just Like Heaven. It's a nice show. very bittersweet. a lil' inclined toward the nicholas sparks style. okay so if anyone wanna know what happens in the end, just remember the movie tagline. only love can bring you back. anyway, the play with lighting and all that was pretty good in enhancing the show. i find there was just nice a touch to the how. i liked it. i think it was a pretty good show - not fantastic but good. The show kinda makes you wonder how love can transcend language or racial differences and all.

well well. then i reached home and i got bored right? i was trying to search for comm iss info for the weird paper on eshoppers. its like... uhuh. global scale is already hard enough... u wanna narrow it down to singapore and malaysia? it's just really difficult to write this kinda research paper. so then i started a convo with him. we talked about stuff. and i realised how much he ha not changed and yet has changed you know what i mean? change is just a funny thing. very funny thing. i guess change is all around every second, every moment but its soooo minute that you don't notice until it hits you hard in your face.

after a long talk with him, i finally decided to get off my ass and go down and borrow a movie to watch. i borrowed 1 bimbo flick(the perfect man), 1 comedy(guess who) and 1 drama(ladder 49). watched one of it and moved on to my new found favourite show project runway. so there's school tomorrow right? so naturally i head for bed after that.

i wake up this morning and i take a deep breath. and then i'm thinking - am i in thailand(pakchong)? or singapore. the air is sooo fresh and i love the smell of it. the cool breeze. fantastic weather. fresh air just makes me happy! i wish the weather could stay like this FOREVER. but then again that would cause a tip in the eco system and then maybe it would be like the day after tomorrow. RIGHT. okay well. i'm inspired to work hard still. cos today they gave out book prizes and there's this new catergory called the director's list which i think you should be able to tell is something like the dean's list. soo its pretty cool and its for the top 10 percent of the students. and i'm aiming for that. shouldn't be that difficult aye? just study and work hard. easier said than done. i think i better get cracking.

friendship's better than nothing.

thursday was a blast. i went for sabrina and jason's ROM. man it was really fun and nice. haha! yeah. the photos were fantastic too. nice ones. hmmm its was kinda nice to see them finally see them MARRIED. they've been waiting for it for ages i know. the photos are uploaded in my imgaestation album: jason and sabrina's ROM.

friday's classes had been routine. just that feat writing is just more entertaining than usual. when we broke up into our magazine project groups we just all had a blast. it was just sooo fun brainstorming. of cos there were alot of lame stuff, alot of laughter.

a shout out to julian aka juju aka juliana aka princess juju - hope you get the starhub thing! all the best and CONGRATS in advance! ahah!

So then what i am doing now is sitting in aunt linna's new house. its fantastic and lovely and WOAH. it sooo nice, i wanna live here. its super NICE. hahaha so huge but still has the homely feel. how nice is that. yeap i just love the house. wheee. anyway i got better things to do now. lol! laters.

during radio i pretended to be a bimbo. then again nicole is gonna say.. gail, you don't have to pretend to be one. you are one. so fine whatever. after radio i headed back home, met beni at the bus stop, chatted for awhile, crossed over to wait for the bus. so then when i was on the bus i remembered, HUIYI! she finishes her a levels today! so i dropped her an sms askign her if she wanted to dine out for dinner and so we rendevous-ed and gem came along too! yeah! i haven't seen them in ages so its kinda quite a BIG thing. so we spoke, and we laughed and we listened.

first we went to gem's place. then to my place. huiyi wanted cds. so thens he got the CDs. gem took my moosey abercrombie shirt. i forgot that i actually planned to wear it on sat. so nevermind. goona meet her on monday again so we can actually exchange clothes. like yeah, i am running out of clothes. so exchanging is a good idea. you get new clothes without spending money. coolness aye? yeapp yeapp.

so then i'm deciding whether or not to go for her birthday bash. cos its like. hmm on a school night. yeah i'm a very good girl. and clubbing ain't really my thing. i'll see about it. yeap. besides i'm underaged cos i'm born grossly late in the year, 29th dec. yeap.

anyway, i'm looking forward to my paycheck?! where is it?!! i need money. badly. not badly, badly. but you know. my guitar is in the hospital? and clothes and phone bill. BAHHH!. come on. and you know what?! i;m sick. in the third week of school. no work and i'm sick?! how sick is that?! like uhuh, WEAK. blah. i used to be strong and FIT. now i'm weak and fat. whatever happened. i tell you what - mass comm happened. sheesh. anyway. i think i should go snooze should i. yea. tata.

one day you'll come running back to me, begging me for forgiveness. and i'll say - i've forgiven you. but what's lost is lost, and cannot be returned.